smh

(Source: theamericankid, via itherry)

…what’s been causing my hair to shed/ fall out so badly.

looking at pics of when it used to be sooo full makes me mad. 

garlic shampoo helped for a while, then suddenly, it came back with a vengeance. 

but, at least i know the cause now, and can fix it.

…updates on that to come.

And so it goes.

Me, being my usual and regularly aloof personality and he, being the way he is.

He, being him.

Him, being Rob.

Rob is one of those men that worries. Worries about every little detail that need not be concerned over. One of those men who would choose to stay home and watch you stay home than go to a game with his friends, solely because he rather make sure his home situation is “stable.”

If one were to describe Rob solely on that definition, I’m sure they’d be inclined to look down in disdain and utter shame at what a situation I’ve landed myself in. But Rob, he’s a good guy. He means well under the dirt and mud of it all, at the core— he means well. It’s just that Rob never learned how to let things be. My life mantra for several seasons now has been to just let things be. That part, the part of Life Lessons 101 where you learn to breathe, relax, and let the world come as it may, must have caught him on a day when he dozed off. I’m almost certain he must’ve dozed off.

darksilenceinsuburbia:

Zeno Frudakis. Freedom.

so friggin dope.

(via harrietsdaughter)

remember me

when moonlight sings

and woos you with its silken voice

to forget my name…

remember me

when sun rays smile

and dazzles you with her brilliant tone

to follow her and leave my memory…

remember me

and us 

and this

my breath of sweet mint

yours of sweet kisses

mingling as lips do

when Love has crept into the cracks

remember me

in this moment

always.

so last week i was talking to a friend who is in the business of casting talent for model shoots and various productions and she told me there was an open call for extras for some HBO series, and that i should go, seeing as though i could use all the extra money i can get in this expensive arse city.

so, on a whim, i went. a few things:

1. met this reeeally adorable French woman who moved here from paris to pursue an acting career. she’s been here 3 months and her accent? awesome. she said it’s hard for ethnic, and especially black people, to get major roles in Europe and if you make it in America you make it worldwide, so she came here. i told her i’d milk that accent for evvvverything when i went in the room. lol

2. there were SO many people there that i definitely remember my number being like 570, and i got there an hour before it ended. we were all given a monologue and upon seeing it i freaked out because a) i’ve never done any tv acting or audition at all ever, and b) i was under the impression that an extra just kind of provides atmosphere and background and doesn’t say anything, and thus doesn’t need to audition. i asked the casting director’s assistant if this specific event was for speaking roles only and she said it was just a screening to make sure there weren’t any crazies among the bunch. i later found out she was completely lying to me, but i’m glad she did.

3. with the thought that oh this is just to make sure we can read, i planned to just read it straight off the paper, like i’d read a book. it was only five lines spoken as the witness to a murder ala Law & Order, and i figured i’d go in and be cute, but not be good enough to actually have to speak. lol. well, when i walked in on my turn and she said speak as if you’re talking to a policeman, i have NO idea what took over me but, i actually acted it out. it was like all the hours of consecutive episodes i watch of SVU were suddenly recalled and injected emotive body language and a tinge of fear and tremble in my voice. all i could think was, i’m really acting, yo!”

it was quite fun. loads and loads, actually. she kept a straight face (which didn’t help at ALL in me deciphering if i’d done good, bad, or really bad), asked if i was comfortable with a speaking role (after i’d asked her what i’d asked her assistant and she informed me that this was a sort of sneak audition for another project they’re working on, and that they have a ton of extra work), and then told me to wait. 

so, i waited.

after 15 minutes of waiting and chatting with my new Parisian friend, i was called in to do a few lines with a tall Ambercrombie-ish guy, arguing about something i can’t quite remember. now that was fun. even more than the first one. i rolled my eyes, threw some sarcasm in my words, and turned my back on him, during our 1 minute argument. 

and then i was done. she said they’d be contacting people thursday and friday and that was that.

friday evening i’d nearly forgotten about it because i hadn’t heard back, and when i remembered and looked at the clock, i’d just chalked it up as a first time fail.

but then.

saturday evening, i get a call from a man saying she’d picked 10 stand out people of the 700 who auditioned to come read for a speaking role for a pilot on a major network. talk.about.dope.

10 of 700? and i’m ONE? so cool. *brushes shoulders off, stanky legs, and pushes up my big frame shades* 

so… wish me luck. my audition is scheduled annnnd i’m planning to go in and kick ass give it my best. even if i don’t get any part, this has been fun and i’ll probably try to do some other stuff in the future. let me mess around and stumble into acting. lol

but, we shall see….

for thicker and longer lashes, put a couple drops of castor oil in your mascara and shake. then proceed to watch your lashes get luscious. 

you’re welcome. :)

down 5 lbs and belly is super flat. wow.

i must admit it’s not so much a fast anymore, as i cheated last night and ate at the girl’s night i went to at my friend’s. all vegetarian dishes and my famous avocado dip was a HIT!

woowoo.

went to Trader Joe’s and re-upped the veggies and fruits, as i was getting low. AllOrganicEverything. yeahh.

deonteosayandepoetry:

Actions

-

When those last exiled exhales exit my lungs,

will you claim my name? Put it on a t-shirt?

When I die will you just write me a poem?

There is no reason to treat me like ghost in the backyard.

-

If a teardrop of spark falls from your face

the lake of gasoline in my chest still…

man…